The Most Important Lesson From The Orange Metaphor

Let’s assume someone is annoying you or annoying you and figuratively trying to squeeze the life out of you. What would come of you if that person were successful at it? Would it be love, joy or anger? The orange metaphor of the psychologist, teacher and writer Wayne Dyer is a tool to understand why it is so important to know what is hidden deep inside you.

Wayne Dyer is well known and has achieved worldwide success after the publication of his book “The Sore Point: The Art of Not Being Unhappy – Twelve Steps to Overcoming Our Mental Troubled Areas” . The orange metaphor came up during one of his conferences in Toronto, Canada. The interesting thing is that he talked about it the day before he died.

His lecture surprised everyone. Wayne used an orange as a prop. Then he started a dialogue with a bright boy, about 12 years old, who was sitting in the front row.

The Dialogue of the Oranges Metaphor

Wayne said to the boy, “If I squeezed this orange as hard as I could, what would come out?”

The boy looked at Dyer like he was a little crazy and said, “Juice of course.”

“Do you think apple juice could come out of this?”

“No!” Replied  the boy with a laugh.

” What about grapefruit juice?”

“No!”

“What would you get out of that?”

“Orange juice, of course.”

“Why? Why does orange juice come out when you squeeze an orange? “

“Well, because it’s an orange and there’s orange juice in it.”

What happens when life puts you under pressure and literally squeezes you out?

Dyer nodded and said, “Let’s say this orange isn’t an orange, it’s you. Someone starts squeezing you, pressuring you to say things you don’t like, and insulting you. Because of this, anger, hatred, bitterness, and fear come out of you. Why? The answer is, as the young man said so aptly, because that’s what it is in. “

“This is one of the greatest lessons in life. If anger, pain and fear come from you when someone offends you, it is because these emotions are hidden within you. It doesn’t matter who’s putting the pressure on – your mother, your brother, your children, your boss, or the government. When someone says something about you that you don’t like, what’s coming out of you is what’s inside you. And what’s in you is up to you, the choice is yours. “

“If someone pressures you and something other than love comes out of you, it’s because you allowed those emotions to be inside you. Once you have eliminated all of these negative aspects that you do not want in your life and replaced them with love, you will lead a highly functional life. “

“Thank you, my young friend. And here is an orange for you! “

The orange metaphor is about resilience

But the orange metaphor also provides other lessons. You have probably heard the phrase: “If life gives you lemons, make lemonade out of them”. Have you ever thought about what that actually means? This phrase, which has absolutely nothing to do with conformism, is one of the easiest ways to define resilience.

Resilience is derived from the Latin word resilire , which means to jump back, to bounce off. In psychology, it refers to the human ability to overcome adversity. This is how resilient people manage to make lemonade (to make the best of it) from the lemons (losses and disappointments) they experience in their lives.

Some people believe that resilience is something you’re born with, a genetic trait. However, many studies have shown that this ability can be acquired and strengthened.

For example, if you assume that change is a part of life and trust yourself, you can become more resilient. It is also very helpful to build interpersonal relationships, to concentrate on the positive, to see challenges as opportunities and to pursue one’s own goals flexibly and realistically.

Work on yourself

In summary, we can say that cultivating your inner world is meaningful. If you just fill it with barren soil, it is likely that only weeds will grow there. But if you use fertile soil instead, and water and nourish it frequently and regularly, you will lay the foundations for a good, fulfilling, and prosperous life.

But if you fill yourself with toxic thoughts or feelings, this will ultimately bring you nothing positive at all, because you are the only person you are affecting and harming with it. Building up negative emotions has many harmful consequences, so work on letting go of them and focusing on the positive sides of life.