Values in A Relationship: That’s How Important They Are
Every relationship is different, but sharing the same values in a relationship can improve it and make it flow seamlessly in healthy, non-toxic ways. Establishing values together as a couple can lay the foundation for a stable and fully functional relationship.
What is a couple? In this context, a couple consists of two people in a loving and more or less formal relationship. What are values? Values are positive qualities or virtues that everyone has. They set a person apart and make them act according to their beliefs. Values can influence a person’s interests and behaviors.
Values in a relationship
A study by Medina et al. (2005) states that both men and women seek someone with similar needs who is compatible with their own personality traits.
According to mate selection theories, people look for someone with similar values (Centers, 1975). Hence, they choose partners who share economic, cultural, and social characteristics (Rice, 1997).
Share similar life projects
Determining the values in a relationship is the foundation for things to work or improve.
Each person’s behavior and expectations associated with the couple are part of their beliefs and social values (Kaminsky, 1981).
The socialization process can change over time as values and social norms are expected to change. It is therefore normal for people’s beliefs and behaviors to change too (Díaz-Guerrero, 2003). Expectations, values and behaviors in a relationship change (García-Meráz, 2007). This creates new parameters that are influenced by the couple’s social environment (Snyder & Stukas, 1999).
Teamwork to improve the relationship
Setting relationship values is a team effort. As mentioned earlier, every person is different, so each couple’s values are different. However, there are some core values that most share. These values are:
- love
- loyalty
- mutual support
- generosity
- mutual respect
- communication
Values in a relationship: love
There are many types of love, but they all share the same core. Telling someone you love them is not the same as telling them you want them. These subtleties are based on the state of infatuation, the anchored love and thus the coexistence. Love also includes the surprise of discovering the other person, falling in love, and reaching a level of stable, long-lasting, and enduring love.
loyalty
Loyalty depends on the couple and their consent. Each couple makes some kind of commitment. Some couples are strictly monogamous, while others are not. When these agreements are made, there is loyalty.
Mutual support
Feeling supported and knowing that the other person will not fail you and protect your interests is something that makes you more courageous and less vulnerable.
The partner’s support is wonderful because it makes you feel empowered and can face things. It’s about putting yourself in your partner’s shoes, understanding them better, and expressing your support and unconditional love.
generosity
Believe it or not, sometimes there is more selfishness in a relationship than generosity. For some, it can be difficult to be generous to their partner as they only know how to take care of themselves and what they need, want, and like. However, this selfishness is less popular with others.
However, being in a relationship is more than that. There are ways to be a generous lover. The best thing is not to think about yourself, to put yourself in your partner’s shoes and try to understand their point of view, even if you disagree with them.
Mutual respect
Mutual respect in a relationship is a fundamental value. Both partners must be on the same level.
It’s about giving the partner space so that he or she has the opportunity to develop their own personality. On the other hand, we also need a space that we use together to be a couple. Respect is also about fully accepting the other without trying to change them.
Communication is one of the values in a relationship that we can work on
In a good relationship, communication is assertive, fluid, and trustworthy. Satir (1988) defines assertive communication as the ability to express oneself directly, honestly, and respectfully.
In short, good communication with your partner means that you both need to commit to sharing your differences of opinion, successes, failures, goals, and needs , among other things. Therefore, develop and work on your communication skills. Because good communication means healthy bonds, mutual respect, affection, love and commitment.